North Shore Medical Center Prepares for the Rapture Birth of J.Lo's Twins

Pregnant Jennifer Lopez
She's glowing! Or are glowing? Photo: Getty Images

While you have been hiding out in your home and office this week, rousting yourself only to scurry through the terrible weather to get from one place to the other as quickly as possible, other people in the New York–metropolitan area have been doing something important. They've been on their toes, ready for action, preparing for the absolute worst. Yes, the staff of the North Shore Medical Center on Long Island have been preparing for the most dramatic of events that could ever take place within the starched walls of their esteemed hospital: They're getting ready for Jennifer Lopez to go into labor. Not only will the birthing of these glorious (seemingly enormous), long-prophesied twins change the course of human history, but it also comes with a great risk. The threat of kidnapping! So hospital employees have been practicing "pink drills," according to TMZ.com, in order to be able to lock down the medical center at a moment's notice in case there is a threat to the magical mystery twins. Of course, this is a little bit silly on their part. What they should be doing is practicing drills for what to do when Balthasar, Gaspar, and Melchior show up.

J.Lo Hospital on Alert to Thwart Babynapping [TMZ.com]