When we learned that Steve Schwarzman's name would not be emblazoned on the architrave (bet you didn't think we knew that word) above the columns at the Public Library, we were relieved for the city of New York. It's wonderful that Schwarzman donated $100 million to the institution, but it will always be the "Public Library," that legendary place that was haunted by ghosts in Ghostbuster and where Jake Gyllenhaal fled when the world ended in The Day After Tomorrow. The "Schwarzman Library" wouldn't sound public at all — it would sound exclusive and rich (and also, let's face it, bald). Instead, the Times reports that the name of the Blackstone Group CEO will be subtly added in five places, as indicated above. "If not shouted," the paper observes, the name was "quietly yet firmly spoken to the world." It will be written in a special old-timey font in letters under three inches high. We'd imagine Schwarzman was bummed that his surname will not join the names Astor, Lenox and Tilden that are written on the attic of the façade (again with the terms!) — except that part of the deal was that no other name will ever again be emblazoned on the building. Schwarzman can rest easy that for the foreseeable future, as we're just he has long dreamed, his name, and only his, will be grouped with those of the great philanthropic shapers on New York.
Most Viewed Stories
There Are Pictures of Justin Bieber’s Big Penis on the Internet
The Rocky Horror Picture Show Cast Takes Their 40th-Anniversary Reunion Photo
Selena Gomez Reveals She Has Lupus, Underwent Chemotherapy
Get to Know Matt Jackson, the 23-Year-Old Who Is Killing Everyone on Jeopardy
Ben Carson Has Absolutely No Idea What the Debt Limit Is
The Paradox of the First Black President
American Horror Story: Hotel Premiere Recap: The Bed Bugs Bite
Florida Settles With Families of Teens Who Died Shortly After Their Principal Hypnotized Them
The Brutal Economics of Being a Yoga Teacher
PATH-Weary Jersey City Wants to Build a Pedestrian Bridge to Manhattan
Latest News from Daily IntelligencerAmerican Who Foiled French Train Attack Injured in Stabbing
Spencer Stone is reportedly in "stable condition."Presumed Boehner Replacement Suddenly Drops Out of House Speaker Race
The House leadership election has unsurprisingly been postponed.Oklahoma Reportedly Used Wrong Drug in Execution Where Inmate Yelled, ‘My Body Is on Fire’
It took Charles Warner 18 minutes to die.33 Still Unaccounted for in Wake of Kunduz Hospital Bombing
“One of our doctors died on an improvised operating table — an office desk — while his colleagues tried to save his life.”Ben Carson Once Bravely ‘Redirected’ a Gunman to Someone Else
"I just said, 'I believe that you want the guy behind the counter.'"Dams Fail Across South Carolina As Floodwaters Kill 19
The state is still grappling with the fallout from the historic rainfall.George H.W. Bush’s Diet Includes a Healthy Dose of Fox NewsFueled 2016 Rage
“I notice he’s not watching ‘CSI’ reruns anymore."FIFA Suspends President Sepp Blatter and Two Other Top Executives
"The rot in the FIFA leadership is so extensive."U.S. Government Wants to Know: Why Does ISIS Only Drive Toyotas?
When Toyota adopted the tagline "Let's go places," presumably they didn't mean the 11th century.Officer Who Tackled James Blake Should Be Fired, Panel Says
A return volley from a review board says Officer Frascatore used "excessive force" during the arrest.
Vladimir Putin seems determined to make everything much more complicated in the Middle East.De Blasio Just Made It Illegal to Run the AC With a Door or Window Open
If you're a small business.Ben Carson Has Absolutely No Idea What the Debt Limit Is
The second-place Republican candidate is even crazier and less informed than the first-place Republican candidate.See 4 Moguls Caught in the Ultimate Power Nap
Sandy Gallin, David Geffen, Calvin Klein, and Barry Diller recharging in Mustique.Ex-Social Media Editor Faces 25 Years for L.A. Times Website Vandalism
Matthew Keys was found guilty of passing login information to Anonymous.Democrats to Launch Gun-Control Push That’s Almost Certain to Fail
They’re eager to show they’re willing to take action, even if Republicans won’t consider new gun restrictions.Rupert Murdoch Praises Ben Carson, Who Would Be a ‘Real Black President’
Spoiler alert: Obama was imaginary the whole time.Report: Matt Barnes Drove 95 Miles to Attack Derek Fisher for Dating His Estranged Wife
"Page Six" says it went down in Los Angeles on Saturday.PATH-Weary Jersey City Wants to Build a Pedestrian Bridge to Manhattan
Jersey by foot!President Obama Calls In Apology to Doctors Without Borders for Kunduz Hospital Bombing
"We screwed up."