Jeffrey Epstein, Original Perv, Rises Again

Remember me? Photo: Patrick McMullan

Well hello again. We've been so preoccupied with other tangential members of the Clinton Perv Posse that we forgot about the Original Perv, Jeffrey Epstein. Today's Post carries a few tender morsels of Epstein news, among them that Epstein appears in the federal indictment against Bear Stearns Ralph Cioffi and Matthew Tannin as "Major Investor No. 1": Apparently he lost about $57 million when their hedge funds imploded last summer. And speaking of imploding, the Post also notes that Epstein will plead guilty today to one count of soliciting an underage prostitute; he's expected to serve eighteen months on house arrest in his giant pink mansion. Here's a suggestion: Why not have Raffaello Follieri serve out his sentence there, too? And maybe William Ash, the Internet psychic involved in the Seth Tobias case, could be their butler. We'd watch that sitcom.

UPDATE: Turns out Epstein won't get to spend those 15 months hanging in the Pink Hacienda of Love after all: After pleading guilty today, he was sentenced to 18 months in jail, followed by a year on house arrest, after which he will emerge a registered sex offender. Jail For Billionaire In Sex Case [AP/Smoking Gun]

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Related: The Fantasist [NYM]