There are a few things wrong with the Star cover to the left. First, her chin is completely obscured, so we can’t see whether her mole was present at the time of filming. Second, and more important, Sarah Jessica Parker shouldn’t be there in the first place. The magazine is claiming that SJP’s husband, Matthew Broderick, had a long-term fling with a 25-year-old redhead while his wife was away filming the Sex and the City movie. The story has a lot of embarrassing details for everyone involved, like the time he visited the postcollege apartment of one of the girl’s friends, disappeared into a bedroom for an hour, and then ditched her there as she passed out in her panties. Eww.
This makes us queasy. Star covers are for Jessica Simpson and Brad Pitt and Heidi Montag — people who live in the make-believe world of Los Angeles (you think they call it la-la land for nothing?). But Sarah Jessica Parker is our celebrity. She’s New York City’s petite mother figure, if real moms wore Manolos and actually had the time to manage their curly hair in this humidity. And Matthew Broderick is our timid, slightly too pale, and henpecked dad!
Sure, it’s fun to hate on SJP and what she represents now and again, but nobody wants her feelings to be hurt. Can we tell a celebrity weekly to mind its own beeswax?