Denver Dispatch: Fred Armisen Does Not Want a Massage Courtesy of Arianna Huffington

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As a gift to harried journalists and conventioneers, Arianna Huffington has set up a Huffington Post “oasis,” offering free yoga classes, massages, vegan hors d'oeuvre, and energy-boosting “monkey” smoothies made from leafy herbs, greens, and tropical fruit. Will.I.Am took the free massage, though staffers said he was too chill for it to have any effect. Charlie Rose had a rubdown, and it was generally observed by onlookers that he probably needed it. But Fred Armisen (politely) refused. Why? “I have an inability to relax,” Armisen says. This includes an inability to partake in anything massage- or yoga-related. “Anytime where it's downtown,” he says somewhat cryptically, “is when I start to feel nervous.” Huffington's highly intuitive team could sense his discomfort and stopped pushing the yoga. “They were very respectful,” says Armisen. “They could sense I was most excited about the little chocolate-y drinks.” (He had at least two.)