Social-Lit Author Tatiana Boncompagni Thinks $1,000 Is a Little Much to Spend on a Haircut

By
Don't think impure thoughts. Photo: Patrick McMullan

Name: Tatiana Boncompagni
Job: Journalist, Friend of Tinsley, author of socialite-y novel Gilding Lily.
Age: 31
Neighborhood: Upper East Side

Who's your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional?
Edith Wharton.

What's the best meal you've eaten in New York?
I love Mexican, so I have to give La Esquina my vote. I’m obsessed with the black beans and rice, and the margaritas aren’t bad either. Plus I always end up sitting next to a celeb there.

In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job?
I wear two hats — journalist and novelist — so it depends on what I’m working on that day. But a typical day when I’m working on a book (which is what I’ve mostly been doing for the past year) includes a morning spent writing new material — I feel most fresh and creative around 10 a.m. — and then in the afternoon I tinker and play with the descriptive passages and dialogue.

Would you still live here on a $35,000 salary?
I did that the first year I moved to New York and worked for American Lawyer magazine. Would I do that today? Probably not.

What's the last thing you saw on Broadway?
I'd rather see a movie, to be honest.

Do you give money to panhandlers?
Double strollers don’t push themselves. So no, not usually.

What's your drink?
Blueprint Cleanse.

How often do you prepare your own meals?
Almost every night. My kids go through lamb chops like Kleenex.

What's your favorite medication?
Whatever they use in the epidural.

What's hanging above your sofa?
An oyster catcher.

How much is too much to spend on a haircut?
A thousand is definitely too much.

When's bedtime?
Nine thirty on a school night.

Which do you prefer, the old Times Square or the new Times Square?
New Times Square. I’ve got kids, and last time I checked, they preferred Disney to dildos and drug dealers.

What do you think of Donald Trump?
He’s produced fine children and has a lovely wife. What’s not to like?

What do you hate most about living in New York?
The pollution and the noise, and the people who won’t budge on the sidewalk even when they see that you are trying to get by, and then get mad at you for running over their feet with the stroller. For goodness sakes, move, people! My stroller’s orange for a reason.

Who is your mortal enemy?
Anyone who tries to hurt my children.

When's the last time you drove a car?
In the Hamptons, maybe six years ago. I drove home in my husband’s vintage Mercedes from a club. He was drunk.

Who should be the next president?
Al Gore.

Times, Post, or Daily News?
Times, except on Sunday I get the Post, too, for Page Six Magazine.

Where do you go to be alone?
The shower — that’s literally the only place where my kids won’t bother me.

What makes someone a New Yorker?
A one-time or current address and a thick skin.