Fathers, hide your daughters — the hottest little hockey player in Alaska is headed down to St. Paul to attend the Republican National Convention with the soon-to-be mother of his child. The McCain campaign flew Levi Johnston down to be with Bristol Palin, the 17-year-old pregnant daughter of Republican vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin, on that family's big night. There have been a smattering of short profiles on Johnston yesterday and today. We've learned that, contrary to what MySpace told us, Sex on Skates is "psyched" to be a daddy, and that he was always planning on marrying Bristol. But nobody has mentioned what role he'll take in the RNC proceedings. Will he go onstage with the Palin family? Will he tear up in the audience like a good political (soon-to-be) spouse? Will Judith Nathan clutch his hand in Republican (and candidacy-risking) solidarity? We don't yet know. All we can hope is that this glorious hottie gets all the camera time he deserves. In a party that honors American manhood above all else, what better poster boy than a gun-toting, teen-impregnating, hockey stud? Hell, why don't we give the guy a Cabinet position?
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