Why Can’t Jamie Dimon Hold His Own Umbrella?

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He's meant to be jailbait, not a lifemate!! Photo: Patrick Andrade/The New York Times/Redux

We understand that of all the dudes on Wall Street, Jamie Dimon is the one we trust the most. He's smart and canny: He was there to salvage the remains of Bear Stearns in March, and Washington Mutual last week. Also, he has a nice face. But when we saw this picture in the Times on Saturday, we had to wonder: At this particular moment in time, with every normal person in America hating on Wall Street fat cats, is it not a little awkward for dude to be cruising around with a Fonzworth Bentley–type character who holds his umbrella for him? We do give him points for the fact that dude looks like Ron Perelman, though. [NYT]