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This is really sad for hydrangeas everywhere.

party lines

Julia Stiles Talks About Her First Time With a Black Man

While you were watching Gossip Girl Monday night, a bunch of theater folks wrote, directed, and staged six one-act plays in the span of 24 hours to benefit the Urban Arts Partnership. The night afforded the opportunity to watch many an absurd situation: David Cross and Rosie Perez fake-fucking on a pile of stuffed animals, and Elijah Wood and Pablo Schreiber (Liev's hot younger brother) slinking around the stage wearing adult diapers. But our favorite moments came from Farragut North playwright Beau Willimon's one-act about two laid-off Lehman Brothers bankers hitting on tourist girls in Germany. Mostly because it included these lines between Julia Stiles and Alexie Gilmore:

Alexie Gilmore: "At least I don't have a tramp stamp on my lower back."

Julia Stiles: "That is a work of art!"

Alexie Gilmore: "How is a giant tattoo of the Olsen twins a work of art?"

Julia Stiles: "I respect them, all right? They worked very hard to get where they are. Plus, I'm a Gemini, so it makes sense."


And this one line about Stiles's character's first time in bed with a black man:

Julia Stiles: "He came over to borrow a highlighter. Next thing I knew, my panties were off and I was sitting on his face."


Man, art is so universal.

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Photo: Getty Images