Madonna’s Mind Control Over Alex Rodriguez Is Nearly Complete

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Photo: WireImage

A-Rod isn't ready to let go of his ex-wife Cynthia, but his special Kabbalah friend, Madonna, doesn't want him to see Cindy. Meanwhile, he's still supposedly going to South America, and maybe even Malawi, with Madonna. Meanwhile, Ivana Trump thinks Madonna must be brain-dead not to have had a prenup with Guy Ritchie. And Madonna's neighbors in her UWS apartment building say the noise from her music studio is too loud and she won't stick to a practice schedule.

In news that's not about Madonna and A-Rod, Usher was allowed to cut the line at the Time Warner Center Whole Foods. Anna Wintour, her daughter, Michael Kors, his boyfriend, and Stylista's Megan Johnson all went to see the new Mike Leigh movie at the Sunshine. Pat Buchanan and his wife endlessly scrutinized the menu at San Pietro. Kate Winslet is angry that Steven Meisel told her the fur rug she was posing on naked for him for Vanity Fair was fake when it was actually real. Lauren Conrad was convinced that a furor would ensue when she was called to the ticket counter over the PA system at JFK, but guess what? Nothing happened. Lauren, you must have been so relieved to know you're not that famous. Right?

Current James Bond Daniel Craig says the next Bond could be black. Ricky Gervais was starting to get on Cindy Adams's nerves, but then she had him over and was charmed by him. Cin also says that John Kerry will get secretary of State because he pulled in Teddy Kennedy for Obama. Cin also wants you to spell out her name and cheer for her because she brought you the McCain-team-hates-Palin news first. Cin, you're so full of yourself!

Judy Collins sang "We Shall Overcome" a cappella at an event the night after the Obama win, and Charles Rangel cried. This week, Annette Bening leads an amazing-sounding, one-night, Actors Fund benefit reading of All About Eve with Zoe Caldwell, Peter Gallagher, Joel Grey, Cynthia Nixon, and others, Liz Smith reports.

Ted Turner and Jane Fonda co-narrate the epic tale of their marriage and breakup. Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon waited until they were married to have sex. Okay. Lindsay Lohan said emphatically that she wasn't a lesbian but that, "Maybe. Yeah," she was bi. Tara Reid is not partying as much as before.