Chris Diamantopoulos Self-Medicates With Tostitos

By
Photo: John Russo

Name: Chris Diamantopoulos
Age: 33
Neighborhood: Upper West Side
Occupation: Actor, The Starter Wife, the season finale of which airs tonight.

Who's your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional?
Peter Parker (a.k.a. Spider-Man).

What's the best meal you've eaten in New York?
La Masseria, 235 West 48th Street. The bottarga is not on the menu, but I live for it.

In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job?
It varies between sleeping in and doing whatever I want and waking up at 4 a.m. and doing whatever everyone else wants.

Would you still live here on a $35,000 salary?
I would beg, borrow, and steal to live in NYC.

What's the last thing you saw on Broadway?
In the Heights. My good friend of fifteen years, Andy Blankenbeuhler, won the Tony for choreography. And the show is great.

Do you give money to panhandlers?
I used to a lot. I guess I have gotten a little jaded about that. I still have a soft spot for good street performers, though.

What's your drink?
Vesper martini: three measures of Gordon’s, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet, shaken over ice, add a thin slice of lemon peel. If it’s good enough for 007, it’s good enough for me.

How often do you prepare your own meals?
Actually, quite often. I’m pretty handy in the kitchen. But my wife’s the real genius.

What's your favorite medication?
Lime-flavored Tostitos and Seinfeld reruns.

What's hanging above your sofa?
A beautiful lithograph done by my mother-in-law, Jennifer Newton. Makes me peaceful just to look at it.

How much is too much to spend on a haircut?
If it looks good, it’s worth it.

When's bedtime?
Varies between 11 p.m. and 5 a.m. See answer No. 3.

Which do you prefer, the old Times Square or the new Times Square?
I got here on the cusp of old into new, and I lived at 48th and Eighth. I liked it the way it was.

What do you think of Donald Trump?
Do I get a grand if I answer this correctly?

What do you hate most about living in New York?
There should be an express walkway lane for anyone who has lived in this city for over ten years. People lack a sense of urgency … walk faster.

Who is your mortal enemy?
The cab dispatcher at 4 p.m.

When's the last time you drove a car?
One month ago. I work in L.A. from time to time.

How has the Wall Street crash affected you?
I've never really been heavily "in the market," but even so, a major shock wave was felt. It's certainly rattled my faith in "the system."

Times, Post, or Daily News?
Times.

Where do you go to be alone?
For a long walk. The best thing about this city is that you can be surrounded by people and still have your space. My favorite walk is from the Upper West Side to the East Village and back.

What makes someone a New Yorker?
Healthy aggression and a taste for variety. You have to be a xenophile at heart to be a true New Yorker.