James Murphy’s Favorite New Yorker Is Himself

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James Murphy and his dog, Petunia. Photo: Getty Images

Name: James Murphy
Age: "200 years"
Neighborhood: Williamsburg
Occupation: Producer, D.J., and the multifarious talent behind LCD Soundsystem.

Who's your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional?
Well, either Lou Reed or the occupying British forces during the Revolutionary War. They had style. Or, fuck all that: me.

What's the best meal you've eaten in New York?
Honmura An, which is gone now, sadly. Luckily they still have one in Tokyo, so I stuff my face when I'm there. Right now I'd say the best meal I can get my hands (and face) on has to be the omakase at Zenkichi in Williamsburg.

In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job?
Self-indulgent, teenage stuff that I get paid for.

Would you still live here on a $35,000 salary?
I've lived here on WAY less for more than a decade, so sure. If you don't want to, there are plenty of suburbs to wait for death in.

What's the last thing you saw on Broadway?
Ha ha ahaaaha ahah aha haaaaa!!!!!

Do you give money to panhandlers?
Sometimes. It's random.

What's your drink?
Are you hitting on me? Booker's bourbon with two ice cubes and a slice of lime, sailor.

How often do you prepare your own meals?
By "prepare" you mean … oh, I make breakfast often.

What's your favorite medication?
Are you checking on me? Booker's bourbon with two ice cubes and a slice of
lime, doctor.

What's hanging above your sofa?
"Snarling Foxes" by Glenn Grancio. Amazing.

How much is too much to spend on a haircut?
I have cut my own hair since '88, so I have no idea. But if you like going to the person, and you're rich, fuck it. $500?

When's bedtime?
After chairtime.

Which do you prefer, the old Times Square or the new Times Square?
Ha ha hahaaaa haa!

What do you think of Donald Trump?
I don't.

What do you hate most about living in New York?
The new wave of aggressive normals. I'm going to start mugging frat boys.

Who is your mortal enemy?
Well, I can't tell you, because I found out most definitively that they were just that: mortal.

When's the last time you drove a car?
Yesterday.

How has the Wall Street crash affected you?
It made me feel bad for all the well-meaning, tortured financial CFOs and
CEOs who've been made to feel guilty by all these lazy, greedy retired people and lower-middle-class homeowners whose lives are "ruined" by huge leverages and unstable fund investments! I mean, how are you supposed to enjoy your golden parachute and last year's eight-figure bonus with these losers bitching all the time? Billionaires cry real tears, too.

Times, Post, or Daily News?
Times. I don't hate my eyes.

Where do you go to be alone?
I walk from the West Village to the East Village every day. [New York] is the best walking city there is. It's the most welcoming and anonymous place on earth.

What makes someone a New Yorker?
The ability to walk on the street with billionaires and bums. In driving cities like L.A., or cities where people are more spread out, you don't deal with other "types" of people, which makes for some horrendous style choices. Here, you want a silly haircut? You'd better be able to stand tall with the 15-year-old kids who just got let out of P.S. whatever and who can't WAIT to hurl insults at you. There's not valet parking here, my blonde-tipped friend with your sequined-patch-covered jeans. You look like a giant toddler, and I suspect you will be informed of that before the night is through. In fact, I'm counting on it.