Lily van der Woodsen’s Aging Son Is Still Stuck to Her Mammaries

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Fall Out Boy guys Pete Wentz and Patrick Stump tried to do an un-amped concert in Washington Square Park Monday to promote their new album, but cops stopped them because they didn't have a permit, so they just sang a cappella and air-guitared instead. Rudy Giuliani might succeed Bill O'Reilly on his radio show. Ponzi schemer Bernie Madoff's wife, Ruth, co-wrote a book in 1996 called The Great Chefs of America Cook Kosher. Ha-ha, love that, Ruth. Anderson Cooper was sighted "[i]n black jeans and black leather jacket shopping for cashmere sweaters at Barneys Co-op wth a young Frenchman." So you're going all edgy-Genet on us, Manderson — good luck with that gig. Ultimate Cute Scruffle Adrian Grenier hosted a benefit for Charity Water at the Met Pavilion, which lent its space for free but kicked everyone out at 10:20 for a high-paying bat mitzvah. Gossip Girl mom Kelly Rutherford is not only pregnant with her second child, she still breast-feeds her walking, talking 2-year-old son Hermès and thinks it keeps her slim. Good Lord, Lily.

At a Screen Actors Guild meeting Monday at the Westin, Alec Baldwin led big outrage against SAG honchos for wanting the actors to strike, even though Nicholson, Streep, and Beatty support the strike. A bunch of Marilyn Monroe's last photos, taken by Bert Stern, sold at Christie's for nearly $150,000. Diddy forwards Google alerts on his press items to his agents to make them get more money for his appearances. So what? We do that. Cindy Adams says that someone says Caroline Kennedy will run for president in 2016 if she'll have served as senator by that time, and also that she will give her first-ever big interview soon. Moby tells Cindy that when he was 11, his New York Times photographer uncle gave him the beat-up camera he'd shot with around the world. Also, Cin thinks Madoff should get solitary confinement during the day but have to live homeless outside at night through the winter. Cin, chill, dawg!

Liz Smith is confident that Dakota Fanning will survive having shot a rape scene. Despite his Harvey Milk role, Sean Penn can't really be so great for gays because he supports oppressive Latin American dictators Hugo Chávez and Raúl Castro, says a new story in The Advocate. Dave Chappelle, Dane Cook, and Paul Rodriguez have been invited to be funny at Obama's Inauguration. Tom Cruise and the others in the movie Valkyrie dealt with its heavy Nazism by desecrating a bust of Hitler on the set. Fun times! Cruise also doesn't mind if Suri becomes an actress when she grows up. And, probably exacerbating the ever-spreading financial fallout of the Madoff bust, Hilary Duff takes back telling Elle two years ago that she was a virgin. Now the real shit goes down.