Forget the fact that Bernie Madoff managed to run a $50 billion Ponzi scheme over God knows how many years without detection: Whoever managed to go into the backyard of his Palm Beach home and steal the sculpture he kept there is a genius.
The theft occurred sometime between 3 p.m. on Dec. 19 and 11:30 a.m. last Sunday, a week after Madoff confessed to ripping off $50 billion from investors in a decades-long Ponzi scheme. The five-foot, copper artwork overlooked the Madoffs' inground pool, and portrays two young lifeguards sitting on a raised stand.
Clearly, this thing was not stolen for its looks or its value (It cost only around $10,000, way less than the average Madoff victim invested.), it was stolen out of principle, as a massive eff you. But by whom? It couldn't have been a senior citizen — copper is not the heaviest of metals, but at five feet, the statue still would have been too heavy for anyone not drinking Cocoon juice to lug it off on their lonesome. So we guess what we're saying is...anybody see the Fairfield Greenwich boys this weekend?