“It’s not easy competing with a Kennedy,” reads the lede of today’s Times story about the competition to replace Hillary Clinton in the Senate. Don’t we know it! How could we forget our ill-fated campaign for People’s Sexiest Man Alive in 1988! But seriously, the paper talked to Steve Israel and Carolyn B. Maloney, two U.S. representatives from New York who are trying to vie with Caroline for the spot. And the results kind of made us sad:
They have variously invited reporters to lunch, cheerfully passed around cream-filled pastries and publicized every stop on their schedules, but still attracted scant attention compared with the heiress to America’s most storied political dynasty. Mr. Israel was greeted by four reporters Monday afternoon at the Mar-Logg Restaurant in Utica, where patrons barely seemed to notice as he held court in the rear of the diner … “If this is a celebrity beauty contest, I am not going to win,” Ms. Maloney said.
First of all, Carolyn, don’t sell yourself short! And second, to both of you — stop worrying. If you just read elsewhere in the Times, you’d know that you’re two of the at least six people who have been sent in-depth, 28-page questionnaires designed to help Governor Paterson choose between his favorite candidates. Sure, Caroline got one, too, but so did Kirsten E. Gillibrand, Jerrold L. Nadler, and Thomas R. Suozzi. It’s not over yet! And judging by how surprisingly untalented Caroline Kennedy is at answering simple, direct questions, you can almost guarantee that on those forms, she’s not going to stay inside the lines.