Daily News Goes All Underminer on Thriving Gwyneth!

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We'd trust this face with our personal information. Sure we would.
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Every seemingly thriving, successful person needs an Underminer to make them second-guess their every decision, and Gwyneth Paltrow, as she branches out from acting into opening a gym and other ventures, happily has her own very concerned version in the form of the Daily News . Gwyn, are you really doing the right thing leaving acting for so long? We just want you to think very carefully about this. You're kind of chilly and maybe not the cuddliest, Oprah-type brand, you know. Just sayin'! In other news, Helen Gurley Brown had to say all sorts of un-P.C. things about sexual harassment and AIDS before Hearst honchos could finally boot her in 1996 from helming Cosmopolitan, says a new book about her. Band-Aid heiress Casey Johnson, whose father, Woody Johnson, owns the Jets, has a new, short hairdo after a reported "vicious catfight" with her ex-girlfriend, Courtenay Semel, whose dad ran Yahoo. That is so, like, the 2009 Sapphic version of how Mia chopped off her hair into that pixie cut in 1966 supposedly to spite Frank before they got married, right? (Yeah, we know, we've been a little obsessed with that Mia-and-Frank chapter recently. Sue us!)

Cin had to endure the indignities of the "windowless, airless" basement VIP room at the Landmark Sunshine Theater's premiere of the Daniel Craig–Liev Schreiber movie, Defiance. But we love that she dryly calls herself a "kindly genteel" person. Oh, Cin, you are self-aware. Cin also says that Jeremy Piven had promised to take model Ashley Chontos to the Golden Globes and she even got a dress for it, then he took his mom instead. And also that Keith Olbermann was told by a fan, "I go to bed with you every night." We've heard he's very verbal! And seems all Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts can talk about is how sleep-deprived they are with that needy new baby.

Eli Manning and his wife, Abby, ate at Nobu, with Halle Berry and Ron Lauder nearby, a day after the Giants' season ended. Linda Fiorentino, the greatest actress of the nineties ever to seemingly completely disappear, typed on her computer at her regular stool at the bar at Pershing Square. Julianne Moore left Dunkin' Donuts at East 12th Street and Second Avenue with three Munchkins. Oh, wait, we mean her kids! And with a nanny, too! Mary J. Blige and 70 guests including Jay-Z, Beyoncé, Busta Rhymes, and Stephon Marbury drank Champagne and vodka and ate a massive cake at Mary's 38th-birthday party at Mr. West Lounge. Longtime New York Times reporter Jonathan Hicks quit the paper mysteriously and abruptly last Friday, saying he had "some things to do."

Geoffrey Rush and Susan Sarandon, who will still be a sexy mama when she's 94, are supposedly going to do Exit the King on Broadway. A top retired New York City cop says he was kicked off this year's panel of the NYPD's acclaimed murder seminar because he openly criticized the police for not questioning Mary-Kate Olsen about Heath Ledger's death. Paris Hilton hid in the bathroom until she was kicked out of a Golden Globes party she wasn't invited to. Jennifer Love Hewitt has a 62-year-old stalker. But one nice thing we have to say about the gossip roundup today is that, excepting these last two items, it was almost all New York–specific stuff today, with none of that stupid VitaminWater Hollywood crap. Did you notice that?