Report: R. Allen Stanford Found

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Vicki Iseman. We're beginning to really hate this lady. Photo: Getty Images

NBC has reported that suspected fraudster R. Allen Stanford has been found in Virginia by the FBI, but apparently despite the fact he has been charged with a "massive" fraud, he was only served with papers and is not in custody. What? More after the commercial break, we guess. Thanks, NBC.
Stanford Found by U.S. Authorities in Virginia (Update1) [Bloomberg]

UPDATE: As a commenter pointed out, Stanford wasn't arrested because the case against him is civil, not criminal, which ... is still weird. Isn't he supposed to be the NEXT MADOFF? Also, according to a Bloomberg source, he was with "a girlfriend" when he was picked up. Which caused us to picture the following scene...

Police cars, surrounding a Fredericksburg McMansion. Inside, a trio of rookie FBI officers, guns drawn, wearing bulletproof vests, beckon each other toward the closed door of a bedroom, from which comes the sounds of muffled laughter and a woman's voice saying, "Oh, Stannie." The rookies surround door and nod at one another. Then, on the count of three, Rookie One kicks open the door. The camera flashes inside: We see a canopy bed with flouncy white linens in the background, on which reclines a woman with large, Dolly Parton–in–Nine to Five hair. She sits up and gasps, clutching the sheets to her sizable chest.

And in the foreground: cowboy boots, attached to hairy, sunburned legs. The camera pans up the legs slowly, slowly, from behind, and we see that the man wearing the cowboy boots is wearing a ten-gallon hat, and nothing else. Through his legs we see the shocked face of Rookie One: "Oh, man," he says, and covering his eyes, extends his hand, which is holding a manila folder full of papers.

The camera flashes back to a close-up on Stanford's face. He is chomping a cigar and grinning. "Well howdy, partner," he says.