Signs That Robert Allen Stanford Is Probably Guilty of an $8 Billion Fraud

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"Like any hot-blooded woman, I have simply wanted an object to crave." Photo: Getty Images

Sure, he promised investors suspiciously high returns, allowed a cattle rancher to run one of his funds, sported an untrustworthy-looking mustache, and spent his time gallivanting around the islands, and, oh yeah, maybe misplaced $8 billion. But we were willing to cut Robert Allen Stanford some slack, since (a) the SEC is really just about saving their own asses right now and (b) lying about what kind of assets you've invested a few billion dollars in just does not seem quite as bad as a full-on Ponzi scheme à la Madoff. However! That was before today, when three things surfaced that cemented our suspicions that Stanford is, in fact, guilty as sin.

1. After it was announced that the SEC was investigating the company last week, his lawyer ditched him.
2. This: "Stanford also donated $2,300 to House Ways & Means Committee Chairman Charles Rangel in 2008, and a total of $10,800 over five years, according to the Center for Responsive Politics."
3. He is apparently missing.

Right. Anyone check the Lenox?