Chef Gordan Ramsay might have the best bonbons in town, but the man is no athlete — turns out he's been lying about being a soccer star in his youth. Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood seems to be taking Keith Richards's threat to sober up seriously — he was seen swapping booze for caviar at the Russian Tea Room. Meanwhile, Super Bowl champ Ben Roethlisberger downed Cristal at Tao in Vegas with Steelers teammates Willie Colon, Darnell Stapleton, and Trai Essex. Chris Brown and Rihanna vacationed at Diddy's Florida home, apparently trying to patch things up, until rumors started flying that Brown was out partying at the Gansevoort with Khloe Kardashian, while Rihanna was left at home. Kardashian, however, blogs that she's never met Brown before in her life.
A doctor was flown to the Africa set of The Human Factor to check up on producers Clint Eastwood and Morgan Freeman, who are "getting up there in age," while Philip Seymour Hoffman had a minor meltdown on the New York set of Jack Goes Boating. And Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson choked down dog biscuits on German TV show Wetten Das to promote their dog-friendly flick, Marley & Me.
The battle's on for whose Bernie Madoff book will sell the most copies. Political reporter Andrew Kirtzman just signed with HarperCollins, Richard Behar is writing for Random House, and ABC's Brian Ross has a Hyperion-backed electronic book coming out next month. Barry Bonds's perjury trial today was postponed, but he's the subject of Balco founder Victor Conte's upcoming book, Balco: The Straight Dope on Steroids, Barry Bonds and What We Can Do to Save Sports. Meanwhile, Marie Claire is starving its interns in the Hearst cafeteria, and Katie Holmes's "purifying" detox diet left her too weak to walk the Oscars red carpet.