Michael Lewis has a small penis. After allegedly beating up her boyfriend, Kelly Bensimon is now accused of stealing her former Elle magazine co-worker’s vintage-owl-pendant design. Twilight writer Stephanie Meyer’s former college roommate is suing her, claiming the story’s premise was her idea. Rachel McAdams and Josh Lucas went to Orchard Street’s Little Giant, where they “blended in with the regular hipsters” and “spent most of the meal making out.” Gross. America Ferrara celebrated her 25th birthday at Kiss & Fly on Saturday night, partying it up with Ugly Betty co-stars Ana Ortiz and Eric Mabius. Jessica Szohr and Ed Westwick sauntered around the Upper East Side with an F.A.O. Schwarz teddy bear.
Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon went to Coachella. Despite Frank Bruni’s zero-star review of the Charles, Derek Jeter, Spike Lee, and Michael Jordan ate at the West Village eatery Friday night. Andy Roddick and Brooklyn Decker tied the knot with a “simple” and “low-key” celebration Friday night, including a performance by Elton John. Under the category of tweets no one cares about, Joel Madden tells us that Nicole Richie cried while watching Susan Boyle. Madonna’s adoption appeal is set for May 4.
Slumdog Millionaire child star Rubina Querishi’s father may have tried to sell her on the black market for $300,000 to an undercover News of the World reporter masquerading as a sheikh. Now Bill Clinton wants to help her. Filmmaker Edmund Druilhet’s next flick is a Bernie Madoff docudrama titled Madoff: Made Off With America. Annette de la Renta is set to testify in court against Tony Marshall after accusing him of changing the will of his dementia-suffering mother, Brooke Astor. Jay-Z thinks no one should blame Michael Phelps for smoking pot. Even though Lupe Fiasco is “superexcited” about his climb up Mount Kilimanjaro with Justin Timberlake and Kenna, he’s also worried about going “psychopath, freak[ing] out, and murder[ing] everyone for the sake of none of [them] suffering.” Donald Trump is perfectly happy with his decision to fire Khloe Kardashian from Celebrity Apprentice, despite criticism from the owner of Georgi Vodka, who says Kardashian would have been a good customer for Trump Vodka. Pablo Escobar’s son, Juan Pablo Escobar Jr., is peeved about a Pablo poser, a rapper who’s been modeling himself after the Colombian drug lord. Is he sure it’s not just Vincent Chase?