Bloomberg Wants Everyone to Stay Calm


Mayor Bloomberg just held a press conference about the city’s swine-flu outbreak, the main thrust being that this is not time for everyone to “crack each other’s heads open and feast on the goo inside,” as the Simpsons line goes. The number of cases at St. Francis Prep School has grown, and up to 100 students and parents may be infected, but the symptoms are mild and dissipate after a few days. Bloomberg made it clear that us humans will prevail over this swine disease using our unique capacity for reason, imploring New Yorkers to retain their “good judgment” and “common sense,” even in the face of a scary-sounding outbreak. In other words, don’t freak out and overwhelm the hospitals with your mild sniffling or coughing, but don’t go to work and infect everyone else either.