Dolphins Join Fight Against the Scourge of Piracy


As the world begins to unite against the now-relevant threat of piracy, it has found a new, powerful ally in dolphins, which, as highly intelligent beings capable of sensing moral injustices, have decided to join with the side of good. Yesterday, as pirates sped toward a group of Chinese ships, no doubt laughing maniacally at the plundering they were about to enjoy, a battalion of dolphins “suddenly leaped out of water” to block them. “The pirates could only lament their littleness befor [sic] the vast number of dolphins,” reports Xinhua, the Chinese news agency that didn’t embellish this story at all. Tremble before nature, pirates! [Xinhua]