Madonna Seeks Hamptons Palaces for Self, Horses

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While Mary-Kate Olsen cozied up to designer Matthew Williamson onboard the Majesty Yacht to celebrate his summer collection for H&M, Alexis Bledel and Lucy Liu both stole the mini-mogul’s seat. Though her rep denies it, sources say Madonna has been Hamptons house-hunting, and while the 100-acre Wolffer Estate wasn’t suitable for her, she presented the estate with a ten-page list of demands in order for it to be acceptable to house her horses. Sacha Baron Cohen punk'd Paula Abdul, and she still doesn’t know it. Cohen, while playing a crazy gay Austrian TV reporter for his upcoming movie Brüno, interviewed the American Idol judge, who entirely bought into his zany character. Robin Wright and Sean Penn are finally calling it quits on their thirteen-year marriage, after Penn has “befriended” Petra Nemcova, Helena Christensen, Ines Misan, Naomi Campbell, and Natalie Portman over the years.

While Christian Cota, Reem Acra, Angel Sanchez, and Liliana Dominguez drifted around the pre-gala bash for El Museo del Barrio, some Mexican businessman was telling everyone that the swine flu was “an American conspiracy to keep gringo tourists from traveling south of the border.” Governor Paterson tossed back a few martinis and bison sliders at Aspen Downtown in Chelsea, while Rudy Giuliani speculated on a poker game at the Grand Havana room, and Bill Clinton, Chelsea, and Ted Danson hung out at Strip House. Glenn Close chatted about her Oprah appearance at Armani/Ristorante 5th Avenue. Rick Lazio was seen hobnobbing with bigwigs at the Four Seasons launch of Mayor Bloomberg’s New York City Card and rubbing shoulders with the likes of Salman Rushdie at the Museum of Natural History, fueling rumors that he’s looking for the 2010 Republican gubernatorial nomination.

Waverly Inn chef John DeLucie’s upcoming memoir, The Hunger, notes that when Michael Caine complimented DeLucie’s cuisine, the celeb-chef graciously thanked him by saying, “no matter how bad your movies may be, I’ll always go see every one.” Mad Men’s Jon Hamm says he’s going green by not buying the new Aston Martin Vantage. Derek Jeter, getting no employee discount, paid anywhere from $600,000 to $850,000 for a season-long luxury suite in the Yankees’ new stadium. Ice-T (a.k.a. Tracy Marrow) is starting his own record label through EMI. Richard Gere clung to his wife amid a cluster of female twentysomethings, all at Norwood to see folk-rock singer Gigi Fouquets. Amy Sacco and a slew of IMG models are hosting tonight’s grand opening of the Griffin in the meatpacking’s former P.M. space. Beyoncé sent a look-alike to her specially arranged tour of Austria’s Albertine museum so that she could go shopping instead.

Lady Gaga is having guy trouble and she can’t understand why, saying, “Men are a disaster area for me. It’s so weird because I believe I am super sexy. I believe I am incredible.” Following his yoga dates and apartment-shopping trips with Josh Lucas, Ryan Gosling cuddled up to a hot mystery model at Da Silvano. Following outrage against her conservative stance, Miss California is launching a campaign against gay marriage. Meanwhile, Top Gun’s Kelly McGillis is a lesbian.