Swine Flu’s Second Attempt at Obama Fails

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Obama laughs maniacally at the feeble attempts of swine flu to infect him.
Photo: Getty Images

It's been revealed that the wily swine flu has now twice failed to take out our president in its quest to create and exploit a chaotic power vacuum. First, we found out that it infected an eminent Mexican archaeologist who gave Obama a museum tour. But as a backup plan, it also found a host in an aide to Energy secretary Steven Chu who had traveled to Mexico on April 13. Fortunately, the virus, apparently lacking a thorough understanding of executive-branch interactions, didn't pick someone who comes into contact with Obama very often, and so that attempt was also unsuccessful. The aide may have spread the flu among some family members, but they've all recovered. [AP via Google]