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Gossip Girl Gets Food on Its Gucci

Reactions to this week's Gossip Girl spinoff in the comments ranged from the positive ("I actually like the the crossover story last night more than the GG portion. I know, I know, FORGIVE ME BLAIR for I have sinned! - 15 for me!) to "It’s a hideous pus-filled pimple on the gorgeous forehead of Gossip Girl’s Prom Night." Now that we've had some time to mull it over, we've decided that, should this thing survive, we can let it into our hearts. We know, we know: There are obvious, tragic flaws. For instance, the fact that Brittany Snow and Krysten Ritter look nothing like each other cannot be allowed to just be dismissed with a casual "I don't see a resemblance." (Oh, by the way, a lot of you were upset about the disparity between Lily's California new-money upbringing and her Upper East Side Waspiness, but that totally happens.) But anyway. After reading your comments this week, we realized that having the ability to cross-reference the past and the future could make the Reality Index so much richer! What we're saying is: Think of it as making a contribution to science.

On a related note, we'd like to offer special honors this week in the field of Recap Science to Michele22, zroddy, ForeverlovinGG, DinosRock, and sarahnargle, all of whom remembered that Aunt Carol was actually mentioned in the pilot, when Lily tells Serena that post-suicide-attempt Eric is "With your aunt Carol, in Miami." Kudooze.

These are my (Intel Jessica) favorite comments from this week, because Chris is away and I darn forgot to ask someone else to do it. It was fun, though! And hard to choose! You guys are all awesome. (If if you'd like this unpaid but highly special duty in the future, e-mail intel [at] nymag.com, subject line I'M CHUCK BASS (otherwise it gets lost in the Inbox.)


• There was a horse drawn carriage in Blair's scrapbook. +20

Lily has begun calling Dan 'Daniel" in that condescending, cold tone exactly like Cece. Such a great touch. +10 —kdow3

• +3 for Nate's comment "Why are you talking in the past tense? We're still here" He smokes so much pot that he WOULD have trouble recognizing the implications of simple conjugations. Good character continuity. And an additional +1 for his obvious confusion about what the hell Blair is talking about and why she needs to be held but going along with it anyway. — idtapthatbass

• -5: There is no way Serena knows what a war of attrition is.
—shayloveschuck

• And B deserves some points for the prom scrapbook, because that is the exact thing B would do, plan out her life all anal-style. And her gold nail polish + ring combo at prom was fabulous. —flickergrl

• What kind of a WASP name is Carol? Carroll, I could understand. But Carol is a 1950s Jewish Long Island name if ever there was one. The sister should be named Libby or Kricket. —uby

• Nate was clearly confused as to whether Blair was breaking up with him during their dance. Plus 3 for his obvious relief when she asked him to just hold her, because at least he knew what to do then. —PurpleandGreen

• Plus 2 for the side eye Dorota gives Blair when Blair says she never looks at her prom scrapbook. The look just screamed "bitch, please!" Minus 5 for Cece's "the boy from the valley" line. Season 1 already established Rufus was the bane of Cece's existence. There's no need to introduce a new "unworthy" suitor for Lily. — jnp1013

• +2 for the moment when Blair hears there will be a crown. Her eyes go dark and her hand instinctively goes to touch it is already being place on her head in an elaborate fantasy we don't get to see. — krissnw704

• -2 pts for depriving us of the image of Serena sitting in a jail cell sandwiched between hookers and… transvestite hookers. At least for the side-by-side comparison…
—NurseLuvBass

• no points but wtf happened to Lilly's car and luggage in the flashback? —New_Blair

• -5 for the confusing No Doubt cameo. I would understand if it was supposed to be early-stages No Doubt (I think the timeline works), but they call them Snowed Out. Real-life bands exist in this show - we're always hearing about how Lilly got poked by Trent Reznor. This was just a crappy stunt because No Doubt is starting a tour soon. Also, minus a ton to the eds for not even mentioning this cameo. I mean, really?

• -10 because (and I know this is an ongoing theme) no effing way, no effing how, would people be doing that much blow (especially in the 80s) and not ONE of them is smoking a cigarette. And screw parent groups for making the GG writers afraid to have cigs onscreen, but totally casual about line after line of blow. —UncreativeUsername

• Typically these high school relationships last until Thanksgiving of the freshman year of college, at which point the boy will dump the girlfriend he's been stringing along in favor of the girls he's been meeting at school. This is known as the "Turkey Dump." —eskandar_khan

• The "Graduate" reference, when young Lilly and Carol sat in the back of a public bus looking at each other with uncertainty, tied together the themes of 80s, youth rebellion and graduation. Plus 3. —SFsistah

• I do love that the prom queen tiara becomes Blair's headband of power for this episode. +5 —DCRed

-• 5 for how unnecessary it was when Owen Campos suddenly leans forward in the car to make the announcement "WE'RE HERE".— maleydaisy

• Just to clarify. Everyone seems to forget that before the hookup and all the angst Chuck and Blair were actually friends, and very close. They grew up together, people. And he is no Nate, so he pays attention. Chuck knows everything about her: her answer to the dean's question, that she wears her beret when she's spying, that her favorite flowers are peonies, the jeweler she goes to, her favorite movies, the scrapbook, her dress size and apparently what she's is going to wear because he always matches his outfit. Hell, he even knew about her pathetic sex life with Nate back in season 1. Of course it's stalkerish, he is Chuck Bass, which makes it even more endearing. Minus a 1000 for me knowing all of this. I need to get a life. —stiletto33

• I OWN PROM!!!
Sorry I just had to repeat it. —ForeverlovinGG


Oh, and confidential to Brooklynberry. All I have to say is: "WHAT ABOUT PROM, BLAINE. WHAT ABOUT PROM!"

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Photo: Courtesy of the CW