How to Spot a Ne’er-do-well on the Upper East Side

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Manhattan's most dangerous neighborhood may soon be the Upper East Side, and not just because of the social warfare. There's been a spike in robberies, according to the Post, which presents some alarming statistics this morning: There have been 58 robberies in the 19th Precinct this year. That's five more than last year. Should you start panicking? This guy says yes:

"It's going to get worse, which is why I'm moving out," said John Roh, 43. "With the economy, it's going to get worse. I remember the '80s, and it's going to be like that."

But not everyone can just pick up and move — what if you have children in private school, or a dependency on Swifty's Cobb salads? For those determined to ride out this crime wave, the Post story contains a few pointers on how Upper East Siders might be able to spot a potential robber.

• Christina Andujar, a 23-year-old on a bicycle, allegedly went on a theft spree up there Tuesday night, during which she stole an iPhone from one Dr. Peter Schlossberg, 55, who was eating at the bar at Demarchelier. Per the Post, victims described the thief as "having the build of a wrestler." CRIME-FIGHTING TIP No. 1: Robbers may be fat, or simply big-boned, people. (That might be part of the reason why they are so angry.)

• "She didn't look like the type of person from the neighborhood," Schlossberg said. "She had baggy shorts on, tattoos on her legs." CRIME-FIGHTING TIP No. 2: Robbers often have funny clothes and unusual markings.

• "She didn't fit into the atmosphere," Schlossberg said. CRIME-FIGHTING TIP No. 3: If you spot a brunette on the Upper East Side, run.

IT'S THE UPPER EAST SLIDE AS ROBBERIES SPIKE [NYP]