There are a lot of things we are afraid of: geese, chimps, weird hybrid animals, dying in a freak accident, butt cancer, cat-murderers, Sudden Obesity Syndrome, ocular herpes ... the list goes on and on. But one of the fears that we confront — let's face it, almost daily — is the fear that we will send an e-mail bitching about somebody to that person. That's what we suspect happened yesterday at the SEC, when a bunch of SEC officials received "a long message" criticizing the agency's unpopular chairman, Mary Schapiro, and inspector general, David Kotz, from Irene Gutierrez, a senior counsel in the agency's Internet enforcement group. According to the Journal, which did not reprint the e-mail out of either empathy or because there were too many swear words:
Ms. Gutierrez about 1½ hours later sent an email to the recipients saying she didn't write the original email. Ms. Gutierrez in her email said her BlackBerry mobile email device had been stolen. An SEC spokesman said later in the afternoon that the BlackBerry was misplaced, not stolen.
Mmmhmm. We don't believe a word of it, quite frankly. She works in the Internet enforcement group, for Pete's sake! Our condolences, Irene. That's awkward.
Update: The SEC called us, which was terrifying because at first we thought they were calling about our Ponzi scheme. But it turned out that they just wanted us to tell you that they determined for a fact that that the email was not sent from Ms. Gutierrez, it was sent from outside the S.E.C network from someone who spoofed her address. Also, she found her BlackBerry. It was in her car.