Though Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty have plans to move in together (and were spotted house-hunting in Chelsea), Getty went for a Hollywood Hills hike with the wife he cheated on, while Miller danced the night away at the Box with her rumored ex, Josh Hartnett. A DNA test confirmed that Jude Law has, indeed, sowed another seed, and though Rachel McAdams's makeup-artist sister was rumored to be the recipient of said seed, it's actually "aspiring model/actress" Samantha Burke who's due to give birth on October 6. Jessica Simpson needs a $25,000-per-episode beauty budget for VH1's The Price of Beauty. Kanye crowned himself the "new King of Pop," boasting, "There's nobody who can match me in sales and in respect, so it only makes sense for me to take over Michael's crown and become the new king." He's a modest one. Megan Fox is sick of people telling her she looks like Angelina Jolie. We know the feeling.
In Eminem's just-released song, "The Warning," the not-at-all-jealous-of–Nick Cannon rapper mocks Mariah Carey's Obsessed video and threatens to release naked pictures of her. After Katherine Heigl criticized Judd Apatow's Knocked Up for portraying women as "shrews," Apatow commented on Heigl's new comedy The Ugly Truth, noting, "I hear there's a scene where she's wearing underwear with a vibrator in it, so I'd have to see if that's uplifting for women." Jennifer Aniston sets impossible standards for 40-year-old women everywhere by looking taut as ever. K-Fed isn't letting his new "K-Fat" nickname stop him from packing on the pounds. Maybe we should tax him.
Katy Perry and Rihanna partied it up at Griffin following Perry's concert, along with Mickey Rourke, Lil' Kim, and a Donald-less Melania Trump (she ditched him after the concert). Ashley Tisdale celebrated her new Guilty Pleasure album at Stanton Social, but says she's a hypochondriac and doesn't like the taste of alcohol. Quincy Jones partied at St. Tropez's Hotel Byblos with Buzz Aldrin and Busta Rhymes. David Schwimmer chatted about his upcoming Entourage cameo with the show's producer-writer Doug Ellin at Coffee Shop. Jimmy Fallon and Katie Couric are hosting a Cipriani Wall Street bash to help Bloomberg raise money for the 9/11 Memorial & Museum at the World Trade Center. And Annie Leibovitz is causing a bit of a brouhaha on West 11th Street, owing $24 million in loans to Art Capital Group for the three combined townhouses she purchased and renovated.