Sean Avery’s Abs Are ‘Quite Distracting’

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Lindsay Lohan, always on the ball, turned down a role in The Hangover because she said the screenplay "had no potential." She's also being sued by a Florida chemist for stealing his formula for her tanning spray, Sevin Nyne. Author Ben Mezrich's Facebook tell-all, The Accidental Billionaires: The Founding of Facebook, a Tale of Sex, Money, Genius and Betrayal, comes out next week, and while Sony was considering Michael Cera to play appropriately nerdy founder Mark Zuckerberg in its big-screen adaptation, they're now leaning toward a more GQ-worthy Shia LaBeouf. A tired Paul McCartney ducked out of London hot-spot Locanda Locatelli early while his daughter, Stella, partied with Madonna inside. While the rest of the pop world honored Michael Jackson yesterday, Britney Spears schlepped her kids around the Eiffel Tower. Diana Ross also skipped out on Jackson's funeral, but she says that whenever his children need her, she will be there. Sean Avery showed off his ripped abs as he cycled shirtless at Ride the Zone in East Hampton. Apparently "it was quite distracting."

Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim (currently the third-wealthiest person in the world), is rumored to be romancing Queen Noor. They've been rendezvousing in Latin American luxury resorts and stayed at the Palace Hotel together last month. Count Alex strongly denies claims that he's reconciling with Countess LuAnn de Lesseps. Penélope Cruz wants to have babies, but she doesn't know if she believes in marriage. Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick supposedly had their eyes on a Gramercy Park townhouse (with a $20 million asking price), but it went to Vogue's Lauren Santo Domingo and her new Colombian-billionaire husband instead. Jane Fonda and music producer Richard Perry were "all over each other" at L.A.'s Sunset Tower Bar. Amid a blustery downpour, Emma Watson accidentally bared her knickers at London's Harry Potter premiere.

Kanye asked Serena Williams to be his tennis coach. Death Cab for Cutie is dissing Jared Leto and his band, 30 Seconds to Mars. Mary J. Blige showcased her finest moonwalk at Pink Elephant the other night. Meatpacking-district nightlifers rejoice: Liquor-license Nazi Lisa Daglian has been booted off the Business & Licenses Committee that covers Chelsea and Hell's Kitchen. After a night of Lily Pond partying, Buffalo Bills wide receiver Terrell Owens's V1 jet was unable to land at JFK and had to be diverted to Islip, forcing Owens to miss his Miami connection. Tragic.

Keith Urban sipped solo at Starbucks in the West Village. A single Jodie Foster spent the weekend buying surfing gear for her sons in Southampton. Meryl Streep gained fifteen pounds while filming Julia and Julia. Keanu Reeves wants to become a chef. Mischa Barton says she's gone from sickly thin to pleasantly plump because of a nasty wisdom-tooth removal.