Name: Josh Harris (American government self), Luvvy (virtual self)
Age: Chronological: mid-40s. Emotional Maturity: 16
Neighborhood: Soho (back in the day). Sidamo (Ethiopia) now.
Occupation: Internet pioneer. Artist. [We Live in Public, a Sundance-winning documentary about Harris, begins today at the IFC Center. Harris and director Ondi Timoner will appear at screenings tonight and tomorrow evening.]
Who’s your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional?
Mike Todd.
What’s the best meal you’ve eaten in New York?
There are so many. They are always served cold. And usually served by saying just the right words, at just the right time, in just the right ear.
In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job?
Wait.
Would you still live here on a $35,000 salary?
I have never made more than $32,000 in salary. Even after I made and lost my fortune.
What’s the last thing you saw on Broadway?
It was 2000, I was at the height of my wealth and watching a parade on Broadway (at Spring Street) from the window of my 4,200-square-foot loft. Thinking to myself, This is luxury.
Do you give money to panhandlers?
Every reasonable time. If I am lucky, they say “God bless you.” What a great deal for a buck.
What’s your drink?
Fresh black coffee in a paper cup.
How often do you prepare your own meals?
My house lady, Calamois, prepares every morsel of food that goes into my mouth with loving care. If you want to eat well, I recommend an extended stay in Africa.
What’s your favorite medication?
I am part of the weak pot movement. I like to smoke big fat joints composed of natural leaves. You don’t get very high, and you can enjoy the act of smoking. You’d be surprised how hard it is to find those leaves.
What’s hanging above your sofa?
I have been letting this Iranian artist dude stay in my compound [in Ethiopia] for a few weeks in exchange for art. One of his oils on canvas.
How much is too much to spend on a haircut?
$1.20 plus a 50 cent tip. I am getting the best haircuts of my life. When I lived in Soho, I used to spend $80 and get metrosexualized. Now I get a man’s-man cut. [Note: When you get shaved by Africans make sure not to “flinch” when they nick you. They do it on purpose to test you.]
When’s bedtime?
When the hyenas and wild dogs start howling.
Which do you prefer, the old Times Square or the new Times Square?
Neither.
What do you think of Donald Trump?
Everyone has a dream. I don’t begrudge the man his.
What do you hate most about living in New York?
Not being able to live there … the Feds and New York State unceremoniously made it clear that my presence is no longer required.
Who is your mortal enemy?
The Admiral.
When’s the last time you drove a car?
Ten minutes ago. I am staying in a Hollywood pool house driving a yellow Corvette. I can barely afford the gas to make it go. I am lucky to have good friends.
How has the Wall Street crash affected you?
Which crash? The first one cost me my fortune (only $40 million). The last one was simply Schadenfreude.
Times, Post, or Daily News?
Times for news in our world. “Page Six” for the truth.
Where do you go to be alone?
Wherever I am. I have been alone since I left NYC.
What makes someone a New Yorker?
A big heart.
