By the Way, Did Bernie Madoff'’s Mistress Mention He Had a Tiny Wang?

Photo: VF

We haven't actually read Sheryl Weinstein's memoir of her affair with Bernie Madoff, but we think publishers really ought to have just gone ahead and named it Madoff's Other Secret: He Had a Small Peen, because it seems everywhere we look, Sheryl is referring to the insufficient size of his member in a new and horrifying way. Today, Dealbreaker sneaked a look between the covers and uncovered another little tidbit about Bernie's, er, little tidbit (sorry):

We sat discreetly holding hands in one of the plush upholstered banquettes, quietly discussing the possibility of a rendezvous in Florida ... "I didn't realize you had such small hands," he suddenly announced.

"I've been told I have a small mouth, too."

"I never noticed that," he said.

I smiled at him in a telling way. He got the message and nervously cleared his throat. It was a dig. Every once in a while I liked to bring him back to earth when he was becoming too full of himself.

We can't wait until the next installment, which will probably go something like this: "As the waiter paused before us with his tray of canapés, I plucked a pig in a blanket from the silver platter and held it in front of Bernie's slowly reddening face. 'Do you know what this reminds me of?' I cackled loudly, then dunked it in mustard and proceeded to devour it whole as Bernie and the waiter looked on, horrified."

Sheryl Weinstein: I Kept Bernie's Ego in Check by Periodically Reminding Him of His Shortcomings [Dealbreaker]
Related: Intel's Coverage of Bernie Madoff's Wang