Sickly Schemer's Trial Delayed Two Months

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Mustachioed Ponzi schemer Allen Stanford's trial was delayed two months after a court appearance earlier today in which he spit up blood and looked all together sickly. A frail Stanford insisted that he was ok, but his lawyer made sure to list the litany of hardships his client has had to endure, including the aneurysm he suffered in his leg, the beating he took at the hands of another inmate, the inadequate medical care he's received and, most disturbingly, his lack of access to a phone. It's almost enough to make you feel sorry for the cricket-loving Texan, until you remember that he stole $7 billion. [AFP]