Bankers Coping With Recession by Beating the Crap Out of Each Other

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"That's for shorting my house."Photo: 20th Century Fox

It's a stressful time for people who work on Wall Street, what with everyone hating them and bonuses not being exactly what they used to be or more. It's gotten so stressful, in fact, that the usual fixes — drinking until one passes out in a pool of one's own vomit, purchasing boats, and boasting about one's baller-ness — are no longer enough to quell the penile insecurity and self-loathing inside. Like teenage cutters, some guys who work on Wall Street want to feel something real, even if it involves pain, swelling, and other men's scrota pressed up against their faces.

"We get a lot of finance guys," Max McGarr, a professional fighter who runs a program at the Renzo Gracie gym on West 30th Street. "It's a good release from their job. If you lost hundreds of thousands of dollars, it's good to come here and get it out."


For those who find legal gyms too tame, Merrill Lynch's John Cholish and his roommate have converted their duplex apartment into a gym. Actually, not quite a gym.

“It’s the dungeon of pain,” said Brian Peganoff, an assistant vice president in corporate cash management at Deutsche Bank.


Incidentally, this is Brian's Facebook photo:


Anyway, God, fighting feels good. In fact, some days, after a long day of exploiting the weaknesses in the market that you yourself created, it's the only thing that makes you feel alive.

“It’s a recession,” said McGarr, the program director at Renzo. “Some days, fighting is the only thing holding them together.”


You know what would be kind of a win-win situation, though, was if someone opened a gym where ordinary people could beat up on bankers. Now that would be popular.

Bankers Enter ‘Dungeon of Pain’ to Cut Stress in Ultimate Fight [Bloomberg]