Seriously. From the profile of the reassuringly orange Fox 5 anchor and YouTube superstar in the Times "Metropolitan" section this weekend:
"In mid-conversation, he will suddenly say something to someone who is not there, but who is speaking into his custom-made earpiece. “I’ve had this thing in my ear for 30 years,” he explained. Wherever he goes, he hears several conversations at once. His wife will stop talking in a restaurant and ask if he is paying attention. He says he feels truly alone only on his bicycle, when he hears just the wind."
Also, he has a note from Dan Quayle on his wall, which is so wrong it's right. Also: Can we just say that the new Times "Metropolitan" section is awesome? The story about the hardware-store guy in Brooklyn? Awesome. Last weekend's laundromat story? Awesome. This section is everything it should be and everything everything should be, and we are not ashamed to gush. Unfortunately, it is probably too good to last, but we're going to enjoy it while it does.