Lindsay Lohan Stood Up Her 77-Year-Old Date

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Jennifer Aniston reveals in this month's issue of Architectural Digest that she shelled out $1.18 million for a Robert Motherwell landscape. She might not invite Quentin Tarantino over. While chatting with Harvey Weinstein at art dealer Nathan Bernstein's townhouse, the director leaned on a $1 million James Rosenquist painting and "everyone was terrified he'd ripped it. Quentin was very apologetic." Lindsay Lohan missed her flight to the Vienna Opera Ball because she was shopping, standing up her 77-year-old date, Viennese billionaire Richard Anderson, who has a history of paying $150,000 for escorts like Paris Hilton, Pam Anderson, Dita Von Teese, and Carmen Electra. One hundred Broadway dancers flooded 4 Times Square yesterday, kicking their heels to Lady Gaga's "Just Dance" as part of a Glamour promotion. Si Newhouse just maneuvered around them to get to his usual cafeteria booth. Courtney Love summarized her relationship with Kurt Cobain for Spin magazine, "I married a guy, he killed himself, I inherited everything."

Designers, models, and editors spent the first day of Fashion Week grieving for Alexander Mcqueen. Kate Moss was "shocked and devastated," Anna Wintour referred to McQueen as "one of the greatest talents of his generation," and designer Richard Chai referred to him as a "genius." After being released from Lenox Hill hospital following a bout with sleeping pills, Alec Baldwin attacked a Post photographer and proceeded to pace around his apartment's lobby muttering, "They are the lowest scum of the Earth. They are the lowest scum of the Earth." Baldwin also said that the only reason his daughter called 911 was because her mother, Kim Basinger, forced her to. While Christian Bale was filming Terminator: Salvation in 2008, he unknowingly rented a home with a dead body buried in the yard. Evander Holyfield's third wife filed a temporary protective order against him after he allegedly punched her in the face. And Hailey Glassman is getting back at Jon Gosselin by reporting to Steppin' Out magazine that "he's hung like a nine year old boy," adding, "he was so small I didn't think he would cheat on me." Kate Gosselin, meanwhile, gave Butter patrons a show when she showed up in a minidress and downed four glasses of wine.

Sandra Bullock was late to Blind Side director Paul Haggis's Monkey Bar cocktail party because she was filming the Late Show when David Letterman hit his stage manager with a football, sending the poor fellow to the hospital. Benicio Del Toro enjoyed wearing makeup for his role in The Wolfman. David Paterson claimed that he couldn't get caught with a woman in a closet at the Executive Mansion because "we don't have a utility room in the mansion." But apparently they have several. And one of Senator Kirsten Gillibrand's aides showed up at a nursing home where Harold Ford Jr. was paying a visit. He was then shown to the door.

After K-Fed shed pounds on Celebrity Fit Club, he took his first post-chub dance class and filmed it for our enjoyment. And to promote a reality show based on his "comeback." Roald Dahl's granddaughter Sophie Dahl says she gave up modeling to write a cookbook, largely because she's always had "nightmares and dreams involving food." Adding that in one, she is "chased by men made from mashed potatoes in stripy tights, chasing me through forests." Maybe she was just hungry. Taylor Lautner spent his eighteenth birthday pumping iron with his purple-haired trainer. Heidi Klum and Paulina Porizkova signed on to guest-star on Desperate Housewives. Proof that Twitter is taking TMI to new heights? Khloe Kardashian tweeted about her sister, Kourtney, tasting her own breast milk. Lastly, Lauren Conrad's second novel tops the New York Times best-seller list, and we wonder what this says about the reading abilities of our nation.