Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are proving their coupledom by PDA-ing around the city (they "kept touching and rubbing each other's arms" at Locanda Verde). But according to Pattinson's Remember Me co-star, Stewart never stopped by the film's set to visit him, though she did show up at the premiere last night, rushing past the press line and stopping only to sulk for a few photos. AnnaLynne McCord tried to avoid the paparazzi by leaving Serendipity 3 fifteen minutes before her date, Kellan Lutz, but they found her anyway. To a sold-out crowd at Madison Square Garden, John Mayer apologized for "coming off like an ass" in his recent Playboy interview, vowing, "It's a clean me now, people. Clean me." Then he spent the weekend "drinking and saying vulgar things to the girls at the bar" at La Esquina. Jessica Simpson, meanwhile, sobbed to Oprah about Mayer referring to her as "sexual napalm," commenting, "I don't want people to know how I am in bed." To make matters worse, Oprah projected Jessica's infamous "fat pants" photos on a floor-to-ceiling screen in her studio. And Olympic figure skater Johnny Weir would only allow Vanity Fair to photograph him if he could wear glittery body paint like his inspiration, Lady Gaga. Brittany Murphy left all her money to her mother and not a cent to her husband, noting, "I am married to Simon Monjack who I have intentionally left out of this will."
While Billy Baldwin was busy getting his Mr. van der Woodsen on, his just-out-of-rehab wife, Chynna Phillips, filed for divorce. But then she changed her mind two days later. Elin Nordegren returned to Florida, but not to her and Tiger's home, and she still refuses to wear her wedding ring. Can't say we blame her. After clubbing (and a game of Ping-Pong) with Scarlett Johansson last week, Axl Rose reserved six house seats to her show, A View From the Bridge, for himself and his "entourage" on Saturday. Ryan Reynolds, meanwhile, flew into the city to attend Scarlett's sister's engagement party. And Mitt Romney took pictures with his staffers at the Great American kosher vegetarian restaurant.
Johnny Depp can't bear the sight of his own studly face, or his dancing, commenting, "I tend to avoid mirrors at all costs. I hate them, can't look at myself. I couldn't watch myself practice my happy dance as the Mad Hatter because I couldn't stand it. We had to treat it like a kind of stunt." Kate Gosselin will join other major celebrities like Pamela Anderson and Bachelor Jake Pavelka on Dancing With the Stars. Mariah Carey waited to enter Vegas's Haze nightclub until Ciara was done singing because she "didn't want to upstage her." Carly Simon continues to keep the subject of "You're So Vain" a mystery, but the song's not about David Geffen, even though British newspapers reported that it was. Following in the footsteps of Snooki, the Situation, and Pauly D, JWOWW filed documents to trademark her name. Snooki, meanwhile, met her boyfriend on Facebook. James Cameron and Avatar cast members Sigourney Weaver, Stephen Lang, and Michelle Rodriguez screened the film at a military base in Bahrain. And Matt Damon's not a fan of his Green Zone mustache, commenting that it's only useful "for a Western or a porno movie."