In his undying effort to convince fans that he’s just a regular guy who happens to stop traffic and attract swarms of swooning teens (and cougars!), Robert Pattinson admits, “When it comes to the opposite sex, I’m not as fully confident as the guy I play. I don’t even remember the last time I asked someone out on a date.” He also says he was bullied as a child. Kristen Stewart told Jay Leno that she can relate to Joan Jett because they’re both “ridden with tics.” Carla Bruni denies reports that she and the French president are each having affairs. Evelyn and Leonard Lauder gushed to The Wall Street Journal about how they smooch in the Estée Lauder headquarters (“but always behind closed doors”), and he even wears pink shirts and ties to please her. Designer Minnie Mortimer Gaghan avoided talking about her still-sister-in-law Tinsley’s CW reality show, changing the subject when it was brought up during an interview, and referring to the dress she designed for her (the Tinsley) as last year’s fashion. Gerard Butler told Men’s Health that he attended Jennifer Aniston’s Christmas tree-trimming party, at which he “trimmed her bush,” then promptly requested that the quote be pulled from the magazine (too late!). And the Beatrice Inn is coming back as a Spanish tapas restaurant, but “the party people won’t be pleased. It’s not going to be anything like it was.”
In tragic news, Manhattanites hoping for winter weekend getaways are suffering severe tire blowouts and bent rims on their Benzes owing to an astonishing number of potholes on Route 27, the main highway through the Hamptons, noting, “A developing Third World country has better roads.” If the situation isn’t ameliorated before Memorial Day weekend, chaos is sure to ensue. Nicolas Cage, meanwhile, is getting sued for breaking the lease on two of his Rolls Royces. Turns out Casey Johnson, the pharmaceutical “heiress” who died in January, had just $75,000 in assets and no will. While advance tickets to Diddy’s “first party in Brooklyn” Tuesday night in honor of the late Notorious B.I.G. were $30, irate fans were shocked to find door prices up to $150, and they spent the evening tweeting their frustration. Tyson Beckford gave Sunday-night patrons of Union Square Lounge a peek at his best Brazilian dance moves, and we’re sorry we missed the occasion. And the Jersey Shore’s Sammi and Ronnie both made appearances at the club Jet at the Mirage, but they didn’t eat together, stay together, travel together, or talk to each other.
Tommy Hilfiger commented on his 2006 fistfight with socialite-of-the-moment Axl Rose: “Axl pushed me, and I said, ‘That was rude.’ [He] had a huge ring on. He wears all this jewelry. [I’m thinking], if I get hit, it’s over. No teeth, no eye. So I hit him before he hit me. It was self-protection. Now we’re friends.” Moral of the story? Beware those with man jewelry. Never one to avoid a shot at making the D-List, Levi Johnston’s been hanging around Kathy Griffin while she promotes her new book in Alaska, presumably in hopes of scoring a cameo on her Bravo show. Michael Lohan’s ex says he attached a GPS tracking device to her car. That sounds about right. Mario Lopez’s girlfriend is pregnant (presumably with his child), and we wonder if their offspring will learn to sit on chairs backwards. And T-Pain opened up about how he and Jay-Z talked through their differences in a heartwarming tête-à-tête, explaining, “Word for word, he said, ‘That’s fucked up the way you took that song.’ I’m a crazy nigga, so we gonna take the song like that. That’s how we take songs. He was like, ‘I didn’t mean nothing by that.’ I was like, ‘I already put out my apology song. So there you go. My bad. I apologize. Apologize for taking the song like that.’ We shook hands, did the chest bump. That was the end of that.”