Once a week, Daily Intel takes a peek behind doors left slightly ajar. This week: The College Student Choosing Between Three Men, female, 21, Manhattan, college student, bisexual.
6:15 a.m.: Roused from near sleep in Jason’s arms by a request for a threesome. Somehow my only qualm is how dreadfully early it is. Steal his shirt for the walk home.
1:20 p.m.: Wake up again and bury my nose in Jason’s shirt. Remember rubbing up against his leg last night and kissing him. Get aroused, but Adam calls. He’s my ex, with whom I recently broke up because I fell for Jason. We’re still in love, though, and there’s awkward sexual tension. He’s calling because our fish is dying.
3:15 p.m.: In Adam’s room consoling him. We’d joked that when the fish died, there’d be nothing left to bring us back together. I can see he’s hard.
3:16 p.m.: I try to kiss him. He gets angry, but what did he expect when holding me, and I can feel him pressing into me?
6:50 p.m.: Adam and I are walking with arms linked and I kiss his shoulder. He tells me he will go to dinner with me later if I don’t try to kiss him.
6:57 p.m.: Back in my room. Breathe into Jason’s shirt again for a few minutes. Hate myself for loving his smell so much.
7:21 p.m.: Decide to masturbate before dinner. Think about the threesome offer from last night. I know my hot Latina friend would do it for her birthday. The thing is, I’m not into her boyfriend.
8:42 p.m.: At dinner with Adam, he drops that his cute ex has had a girl go down on her. I try not to look scheming, but I want her. I suggest a threesome, which is immediately shot down. Go figure.
9:05 a.m.: Wake up and can’t get back to sleep, so I masturbate, thinking about Jason and the last night we were together. Suddenly the face of Nathan, another guy I’ve been hooking up with since the breakup, pops up and I come.
10:06 a.m.: I wake up for real this time and notice some texts from Nathan last night. Decide to request a little afternoon delight from him later after I have showered and groomed. Remember that I need a new razor.
11:48 a.m.: Brunch with best friend, where I tell her about my recent sexploits. She’s less horrified than I thought she would be. She asks what it was like going down on a girl, which I did last week. It was easier than a guy.
4:02 p.m.: Nathan messages me and asks if I have a spare ethernet cable. He’d rather I come there, but when I mention I’m naked (I am), he changes his mind.
4:35 p.m.: After the ritual of small talk, I’m finally blowing Nathan. I asked for sex, but he ran a half marathon today and is exhausted. He pulls my hair and shoves my face down onto his cock. I like it.
4:54 p.m.: Too tired to keep cuddling, Nathan leaves. I decide to masturbate. I throw Jason’s shirt over my face so I can smell him while I do.
6:50 p.m.: Text Jason that I’m horny, and that he should probably look out at the full moon tonight.
2:16 a.m.: Woken from sleep by a text from Jason. Says he’s going to sleep soon, that he’s been busy all day, and that he’s drunk. I frantically text him back and ask that he come over. I’m anxious and have writer’s block.
3:05 a.m.: I finally meet Jason downstairs. We kiss and share a cigarette. We’re both nervous, for some reason.
3:23 a.m.: We’re finally having sex, and it’s intensely passionate. I didn’t think that this existed in real life, but we’re barely moving and both of us want to come. There’s something strong between us, but he won’t call it love.
4:08 a.m.: Jason tries to leave but I kiss him some more, passionately, and he stays. We have sex again, not emotionally this time but intensely physically. I come repeatedly.
4:23 a.m.: We’re both drenched in sweat and I’m shaking and panting on top of him. Cute words are exchanged, but nothing passionate like before. This is good: It means he’s more likely to come back easier.
2:01 p.m.: Run into Nathan at breakfast, exchange small talk. Consider telling him about my adventures with Jason, but wonder whether he would take offense.
2:04 p.m.: Think about last night’s sex and get aroused in the breakfast place. Hope this doesn’t impact my ability to work.
6:39 p.m.: Start thinking about last night again, this time at work. Thinking about Jason’s jeans and pulling him closer and kissing his belly and squeezing his muscular thighs and feeling him get hard against me. Paying attention has become difficult.
11:01 p.m.: On the subway, see a man in a bowler standing near the door. He is well-dressed and attractive and we play glance tag. As I leave the subway, I look him in the eye, and he looks back at me as the subway pulls away. Craigslist “Missed Connections” tonight.
11:57 p.m.: Talking to a friend’s love interest online. He lives the floor below me. Imagine calling him up here and fucking him dirty. Am immediately aroused, then guilty.
12:32 a.m.: We’re talking about sex now. I just made a ‘defensive end’ joke. Oh, God. I would totally be on him. Changing the subject to children.
2:18 a.m.: Masturbate before bed, thinking about Jason.
4:14 p.m.: Coffee with a friend after class. She confesses that she has a vibrator, and when I mention that I don’t have one, offers to go downtown and get one with me. I ask her if she thinks I really need one.
8:15 p.m.: Drunk off wine, I go to Jason’s place to return his shirt. While I kiss his neck, he reaffirms that he doesn’t love me and can’t in good conscience see me. I can feel that there’s at least some part of him that wants to see me.
8:21 p.m.: Jason sends me away for good. I text Nathan, but he has an exam in the morning.
9:30 p.m.: I’m extremely drunk with my friend, and start telling her about all the naughty things I’ve done over the past week.
12:01 a.m.: Lying in bed, texting Jason and telling him that I love him, stupidly. Text Adam and ask him to come over. I’m so drunk I think I’m dying.
2:18 a.m.: Adam comes over with our mutual friend. I’m pissed he brought someone so I tell him that since I’m naked, only one of them can stay. Adam is pissed but sends him away and comes to sit beside me. I kiss his hands.
2:16 a.m.: I try to kiss Adam and he leaves, angry. I receive a text from Jason, telling me that he thought I understood that he just loved sex.
10:50 a.m.: Wake up. Nathan is online. Tell him he better not run a half marathon today as I am going to need a serious booty call tonight.
7:42 p.m.: Going to dinner with a male friend I’m worried about hitting on, so I masturbate but can’t figure out who to fantasize about.
8:10 p.m.: Dinner. We hold hands.
9:34 p.m.: Consider going to see Jason as I am very horny, but after my declaration of love last night, I decide not to see him anymore. He’s probably deleted my number anyhow.
10:34 p.m.: Drinks with Adam’s best friend. He tells me about all the kinky things that he and his girlfriend do.
11:45 p.m.: Adam’s best friend and I are both very drunk and he’s teaching me how to grind Latin style. Not too much hips, he warns. It’s more sensual than that.
12:18 a.m.: At a party, making out with another mutual friend. Adam’s best friend tells me I should make him my first Puerto Rican, but I’m too drunk to function so I give him my number and head home.
2:10 p.m.: Checked out by men on the street. Feeling very sexy, despite being hung-over.
6:14 p.m.: Browsing dirty pics now that I’m home.
6:26 p.m.: Get horny, decide to masturbate, but just not feeling it. Can’t decide if it’s the country music I’m listening to or the pics.
8:45 p.m.: At a play and notice that James is there, who just happens to be God’s gift to women. We talk and I touch his arm and am immediately aroused. Adam is also there and there is more awkward hugging.
10:52 p.m.: I consider masturbating before bed to help me sleep, but am still not feeling it. I feel like my sex drive has gone completely.
9:30 a.m.: Wake up from a dream about Jason and masturbate immediately. I have the best orgasm I’ve had since the last time we were together. Perhaps my sex drive isn’t gone after all.
7:23 p.m.: The friend’s love interest from the floor below messages me and asks me if I want to chill. I really do. Thinking about him makes me wet. I tell him I’m busy tonight, which I am.
8:42 p.m.: Watching a friend’s play and am very attracted to the main character and wonder if he’s single.
11:34 p.m.: At the cast party for another show. My slutty friend is changing her panties in front of a few men we know. They ask me if I’d like to do it too. I don’t know how to reply without calling her a skank, and/or insinuating as much.
2:20 a.m.: Adam shows up drunk out of his mind. I try to touch him and tickle him but he snaps at me and tells me that he’s still angry with me, so I leave with his best friend.
2:43 a.m.: On our way home, Adam’s best friend tells me that I present a danger to him because he knows his girlfriend wants to sleep with me, and vice versa. He tells me I can sleep in his room tonight if I have to, and that he will wear long pajamas. I remind him that I have a room of my own.
2:50 a.m.: Passing the bar I always go to, my hot friend is outside smoking a cigarette and asks if I want one. I send Adam’s best friend home without me.
TOTALS: Six acts of masturbation, one aborted due to lack of sex drive; two acts of intercourse; one act of fellatio; one dead relationship fish; one text from guy stating that he thought it was “understood that he just loves sex.”