Ashley Olsen: Grounded

Ashley Olsen and Justin Bartha’s United flight from New York to L.A. had to make an emergency landing near D.C. owing to a fire in the cockpit. A fire broke out right before Mariah Carey’s concert in Eygpt, but she found a towel and extinguished it herself. John Travolta’s dogs were killed in a tragic Maine airport incident. Despite insisting they’re not a couple, Jamie-Lynn Sigler and Mark Sanchez “definitely looked more than friends” while celebrating Sigler’s birthday at Abe & Arthur’s with Yankee Nick Swisher, Joanna Garcia, Lance Bass, and his Queer Eye boyfriend, Kyan Douglas. Miss USA 2010 Rima Fakih may be stripped of her crown owing to recently surfaced photos of her stripping, pole-dancing, and stuffing dollar bills in her bra. Joan Rivers scurried about the Miss USA pageant rehearsal wearing the official crown, and when asked how it felt to be Miss USA, she responded, “It was worth it to sleep with Donald.”

LeBron James’s attorney denied reports that James’s mother is sleeping with his teammate Delonte West. Woody Allen spoke out in support of the sex-scandal–ridden Roman Polanski, commenting, “He has paid his dues.” Rachel Uchitel is set to pose naked for Playboy, but the modest mistress “will not be completely naked … just the backside and the topside.” Post breast augmentation, Kate Hudson admits that she’s “comfortable with [her] body’s imperfections.” According to a source on The Hills, Kristin Cavallari has it in for Lo Bosworth, noting, ” Lo has said some really nasty things about Kristin, and it got back to her. She’s OK with most of the other girls, but she legitimately hates Lo.” Meanwhile, Cavallari “kisses up” to Audrina.

Demi Moore is penning a memoir. Salmon Rushdie donated an original work to the Riverkeeper benefit auction at the Standard, but auctioneer Brooke Geahan announced that she’d be raffling off kisses from Rushdie as well. Kate Bosworth ventured to Sweden to meet boyfriend Alexander Skarsgård’s parents. Demi Lovato says Joe Jonas is her “first serious relationship,” as evidenced by her relationship-newbie commentary, “I think ultimately, everyone who knows us knows that we’ll always be best friends, no matter what happens.” Kathie Lee Gifford sipped Champagne over lunch at Frankie & Johnnie’s with 30 Rock dreamboat Cheyenne Jackson. And Paula Deen claims she has low cholesterol.