Megan Fox Would Rather Starve Than Cook

Jennifer Aniston shows off her ripped abs for Smartwater, and says she never had Botox or went on a “baby-food diet.” Rather, she maintains a healthy diet and suggests that people “just stop eating shit every day.” Sharon Stone claims she’s sworn off plastic surgery since looking “like a trout” after getting lip injections. Megan Fox says she’d starve to death before attempting to cook for herself. She also claims to have OCD and want to cause “physical harm” to the paparazzo who snapped a topless photo of her. Lindsay Lohan was ordered to attend a probation hearing after missing alcohol-education classes imposed after her 2007 drunk-driving incident, but she’s busy in Cannes this week. Another report, however, says she’s earning outstanding grades in her DUI class. Jonathan Rhys Meyers is back in rehab. And Robert F. Kennedy Jr.’s 50-year-old wife, Mary, was arrested for drunk driving.

After splitting with Ed Westwick last month, Jessica Szohr’s been getting cozy with another Brit, her Love, Wedding, Marriage castmate Richard Reid. Paris Hilton got to Cannes late because she forgot her passport and couldn’t board her flight from Madrid to Nice. Onstage at the “Time to Give” charity event, Jay-Z referred to Kelsey Grammer as “Chelsea Grammer,” but no one seemed to mind; a watch signed by HOVA still auctioned off for $220,000. When Donald Trump cut the line at NBC’s upfront presentation, Parenthood’s Erika Christensen whispered to castmate Sam Jaeger, “I think we just got Trumped.” Patti Stanger has set up shop in New York, and she’s already feuding with matchmaker-in-residence Janis Spindel, who referred to Stanger’s business and reality show as “disgusting.” And Cameron Diaz isn’t afraid of commitment and hates big weddings.

Ashley Greene, who hasn’t fallen under Edward Cullen’s spell, says Robert Pattinson “doesn’t understand girls.” Justin Bieber got a bird tattooed on his left hip. Forty-seven-year-old Kelly Preston has John Travolta’s bun in her oven. Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz’s son was in a minor car accident while driving with his nanny, though the tot escaped unharmed. While strolling through Limelight Marketplace, Jimmy Fallon reminisced about clubbing in the former church. And when Vegas’s Lavo didn’t have any A.1. steak sauce, Floyd Mayweather pulled his own out of his bag.