Blake Lively Wants to Kill Serena Van Der Woodsen

Blake Lively is supposedly sick of playing Serena van der Woodsen and would like to be killed off of Gossip Girl. A hair-extension company is suing Paris Hilton for $35 million for blowing off her duties as a promoter. Hilton, meanwhile, wants a role on True Blood, but Adrian Grenier wants to get her on Entourage. Marsha Revel, the judge who sent Lindsay Lohan to jail, has removed herself from Lohan’s case without explanation. Bill O’Reilly thinks that by promoting single motherhood, Jennifer Aniston is “destructive to our society.” Angelina Jolie would be happy to rush to Jen’s defense.

To prove she hasn’t had Botox, Teri Hatcher posted pictures of herself raising her eyebrows and wrinkling her face. Fantasia Barrino has been released from the hospital following her suicide attempt. Rihanna got a neck tattoo that reads “rebelle fleur,” which is French for “unruly flower.” Zac Efron celebrated his Details cover by doing shots with Vanessa Hudgens. Despite previous reports, Kim Kardashian is not hooking up with soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo. Le Cirque owner Marco Maccioni fed his Labrador-pit-bull mutt dinner and Champagne at the restaurant’s bar. And Edie Falco is set to introduce a film about celebrities and their dogs, including pooch owners Richard Gere and Glenn Close.

Australia’s Famous magazine reports that Victoria Beckham is pregnant. Bethenny Frankel thinks Gisele’s suggestion of government-mandated breast-feeding is “absurd.” Simon Cowell supposedly hired an SEO firm to place positive stories about him at the top of search-engine results. Beyoncé brings her curves out in full force for the new House of Deréon ad campaign. When asked about Levi Johnston’s run for mayor of Wasilla, Bristol Palin commented, “I never knew he had political aspirations.” Kelsey Grammer’s 29-year-old girlfriend is expecting his child. Katy Perry’s mother flirts with her soon-to-be son-in-law, Russell Brand, and sends him “inappropriate” e-mails. And Laurence Fishburne’s daughter says her “passion” for porn began at age 16.