Tennessee Titan Chris Simms was arrested on West Houston Street for driving while under the influence of marijuana last month. In court shortly after, he claimed that when he said “I was smoking in the car,” he meant he was smoking cigarettes. But court records uncovered by the Post today tell a different story: “I took four puffs,” cops reported that Simms said during his arrest. “There’s nothing in the car. I smoked everything before.” As cigarette smokers know, one doesn’t tend to refer to smoking in terms of “puffs” and “everything” unless it’s something a bit on the stronger side. Still, Simms claims that cops had no probable cause to pull him over and is fighting to have his comments thrown out. And we mostly just wanted to share this story for the chance to use the word “doobious” in a headline.