When you walk into your local bank branch to debate an overdraft fee, cash a foreign check, or make a deposit on a Friday, the twentysomethings behind the counter who are filing their nails or casually discussing lunch options and break times have you by the balls, no question. But you'd think when you're attempting to rob them they'd treat you with a little respect. That they'd see that this time, you're the one in charge, they're at your mercy. But that's not what one aspiring bank robber found when he walked into the Chase on Seventh Avenue near West 37th Street last Friday and handed the 26-year-old teller a demand note.
Per the crime log:
The handwritten note read, "This is a robbery, hand over all cash except bait money. You have 15 seconds or else the customers!"
The customers — the customers what? The sentence as written in the crime log looks unfinished, which we can only imagine is because the robber realized he'd made a fatal mistake in assuming a Chase representative would give a rat's ass about the customers and stopped speaking. He then quickly tried to backtrack, but to no avail.
The teller told him that she would be right back and started walking away, prompting the thug to shout, "No, this is serious!"
But the would-be thief then became nervous and fled.
We've always suspected and now we know for sure: There is no weapon more powerful than the cold indifference of an American retail representative.
Daily Blotter [NYPD Blotter/NYP]