Scientologist Infomercial King Has Some Strange Ideas About Fruit Juice, Dictionaries

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Infomercial impresario Kevin Trudeau has yet to pay a penny of his $37.6 million fine to the FTC for deceptive TV commercials pitching medical cures and get-rich-quick schemes. But that doesn’t mean he’s not interested in helping you be your best. Take the lengthy memos he sent appreciative staffers over the years on topics like Policy #4: Fresh organic fruit and vegetable juice: “I am not going to order you to drink juice but you should consider drinking juice. I want to talk about why you should be drinking juice and then we’re going to institute something that’s very simple to make sure that it’s available too [sic] everybody, every day if you so choose. It’s your option.”

Some other policies and the lessons you, too, can learn!

Policy #16: Clean desk policy

Lesson: Sometimes, a light bulb does want to hurt you.

Policy #8: Use dictionaries

Lesson: If you feel sleepy, read a dictionary!

Policy #20: Scientology and Dianetics

Lesson: What, John Travolta and Tom Cruise don’t seem happy to you?

Revealed: Sh*t My CEO Says [Smoking Gun]