Fake Steve Jobs Has Some Thoughts on Apple’s Competition

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Photo: The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs

"All I can tell you is that when we look out at the marketplace, in terms of competition, we just don’t see Android. We don’t. We see Windows Phone 7, which is so late that it won’t have a chance. We see RIM, in our rearview mirror, yelling at us to slow down. We see Palm, or at this point just a few fingers, still wiggling as they slide under the surface of the water for good as they drown. We see Nokia, lumbering up ahead of us like a big dimwitted Finnish reindeer, slumped on an ice floe, badly wounded, losing blood, just waiting for me to sneak up and bash it over the head with a club and finish (sorry) it off. But Android? Honestly, we just don’t see it." —Fake Steve Jobs riffs off of real Steve Jobs's frank discussion of his competitors' flaws at the Apple earnings call earlier this week. Remember when fake celebrities got an entire blog devoted to them and not just a fake Twitter? Those were the days.

I’m not worried about Android. That’s why I keep talking about it all the time. [Fake Steve Jobs]