Is Cheating Worse If You Do It in the Bed You Share With Your Spouse?

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Photo: Tim Sloan/AFP/Getty Images

Today in the Times, adultery's Paper of Record, Joyce Wadler examines the phenomenon of cheaters who have extramarital sex in the bed that they share with their spouse. Apparently, for most wronged partners this is a sin above and beyond mere adultery. Wadler found a woman who carved the word SLUT into headboards, and one who even threw a lit match onto the bed while her naked husband was still in it. (For men, apparently, having a spouse cheat in the home that they own — not necessarily the bed — is the image that stings the most.) And, anecdotally at least, this is a more frequent occurrence in New York in particular:

Susan Bender, of the New York firm Bender, Rosenthal, Isaacs & Richter, has been a divorce lawyer for 31 years. She estimates that 10 percent of her firm’s clients or their spouses have engaged in infidelity in the home. She cites a number of reasons, including an obvious, pragmatic one: in New York, hotels are expensive.

Oh, well, see? Every New York spouse understands that.

Don't Try This at Home [NYT]