Runaway Wisconsin Lawmakers Will Quickly Go Mad Without Sex


There's a precedent for what's happening in Wisconsin right now. In 2003, Democratic legislators in Texas fled for Oklahoma, then New Mexico, to deny a quorum for a vote on a Republican-backed redistricting plan (which ultimately passed). And one veteran of that incident has some advice for Wisconsin's runaway state senators: Bring your wives to Illinois for emergency sex.

"If you are going to be out more than two weeks call your spouse for conjugal visits," explained Texas Democrat Leticia Van de Putte, who, back in 2003, was one of 11 state senators who fled to New Mexico in order to stall Republican redistricting plans. "After two weeks — and most of my colleagues are men — I said get their wives here and quick because you are under intense stress."

We knew politicians were horny, but really, two weeks? Have they never had dry spells of more than two weeks? What happens after two weeks of no sex? They freak out? Can't function? Start molesting strangers? Turn into werewolves? Werewolves that molest strangers?

Texas Dems To Fleeing Wisconsin Lawmakers: 'Call Your Spouses For Conjugal Visits' [HuffPo]