Do you like to play the ponies? Is that not enough for you? Do you also like to play the slot machines? Do you dislike going anywhere at all that's far from home?
If you answered yes to all of the above, you are probably an elderly man or woman, possibly in a velour sweat suit, and it is your lucky day, which will come in handy: Today marks the grand opening of Queens's Resorts World Casino New York City, the city's first casino, "featuring 5,000 video gambling terminals and electronic table games, including craps and a popular Asian dice game known as sic bo; restaurants like Chinese dim sum and the Stage Deli; and 6,500 parking spots." (No human dealers are permitted, per New York law.) In case that wasn't enough, the casino is also attached to a racetrack that once hosted both Pope John Paul II and Secretariat (separately, alas) and there are glitz-encrusted Sex and the City–themed slot machines.