Once a week, Daily Intel takes a peek behind doors left slightly ajar. This week, the 53-Year-Old Man With Trouble Climaxing: Male, Researcher, 53, Fairbanks, Alaska, straight, separated from wife and in a live-in relationship with a single mom.
10:30 p.m. A., my live-in girlfriend, and I went to a bar after work, met our friend T. there. Not much going on, so we headed home.
11 p.m. A. wants to get stoned and watch anime. I have my typical dual reaction. One the one hand, she gets incredibly horny when she’s high, while I find it easier to focus and easier to come when I am. On the other hand, I always run out of steam before she does. I perform better, but then have massive performance anxiety. Sex is full of both anxiety and pleasure for me.
Midnight After we’re both high, she wants a back rub, which turns into anal sex, since I already have the oil there and she’s in position. I come really hard, which we both like. Of course, she’s not done, but my penis is. I spend the rest of the evening with my fingers and eventually most of my hand inside her. Also, when she gets stoned, she really likes me to suck on her nipples. She says it is like a straight line down to her clit.
4 p.m We’ve spent the day just House Mousing, as she calls. Puttering around, reading, doing a few chores. She looks really good in sweats.
11:30 p.m. A. is wearing her rust-colored nightie. Things start with kissing and caressing and quickly move to oral sex, and I do a very thorough job, happily. I love the way she tastes! Finally come up for air, and crawl on top of her. She rubs my penis against her, then leads me inside her. We have sex for a while but I realize I’m not going to come so I finally roll off, exhausted. She tries oral sex but when that doesn’t do it, she cuddles with me. I don’t mind that I didn’t come. I had a great evening, though it would’ve been better if ‘d come. I just didn’t feel the need.
11 p.m. A. and I are reading Texts From Last Night in bed, and I make the comment that all vaginas look alike to me, but add that I’ve not seen all that many, so I have no way to truly compare them. She asks me if I need more experience! I don’t take that as an invitation to go tom-catting, more as an insecurity on her part. Funny, she thinks I will get bored with her. I am more afraid that she will get bored with me. I wish I were a teenager again. Shoot, I wish I’d known her when I was a teenager.
11:30 p.m. After playing with me for a while, she mounts me. She likes it because she gets maximum penetration. She comes, I don’t. Again. Sigh. I know I am not aging out of the sex game, but it feels like it sometimes. Maybe I could have tried harder, but what she was doing felt great, and sometimes when I try too hard, it just takes the pleasure of it. Or maybe I am just changing the way I have orgasms. I don’t need to come anymore, not like I used to.
7:30 a.m. Wake up with A. stroking me. I tell her the joke about the married couple where the guy says, “If you want to have sex, pull my penis once. If you don’t want to have sex, pull it 354 times.” I’m still thinking about our conversation last night, although soon I’m totally concentrating on what she’s doing. Her hand moves all over me, and soon I’m ready for more. I finally take over and position myself so I’m masturbating while straddling her face. This seems to be a pattern for us, but never one I get tired of. She likes tasting my cum as much as I like tasting hers, although with mine, lately, there seems to be less and less of it.
12:15 p.m. Came home for lunch and she’s gone, but there’s lingerie all over the living room. Funny, she rarely wears panties, but loves lingerie. We both do.
2 p.m. In the middle of analyzing policy when an image of her naked body comes to mind, and I’m immediately distracted. Go back and forth between looking at policy and dreaming of licking her. When we first got together, she said she didn’t like cunnilingus, and while it is still not her favorite thing to do in bed, she gladly submits to my desires. I, on the other hand, love it. It never did anything for my ex, so I am sure I liked it more than she did too. Despite her professed aversion to it, A. can come a lot from getting head.
3:30 pm A. texts me to tell me she’s wearing purple-and-black lace panties.
10 p.m. In bed, we play music for each other from Wolfgang’s Vault, and all she wears is those panties. I should have jumped her, and pumped for all she was worth, but I am enjoying looking too much. We snuggle and fall asleep.
8:15 a.m. After shower, get back in bed, where A. gives me both a hand job and oral sex. I whisper dirty sweet nothings in her ear while she touches me, then I return the favor with a hand job for her until she comes. Once again, I don’t come, but we set a lunch date. She’s promised to wear a black string thong, and a lace camisole I’ve picked out. I cannot wait to see her in it.
2 p.m. Lunch is a bust. I had to take care of work business, and it took more than my share of lunchtime, so we didn’t get to have our date. Tonight will have to be my moment to appreciate her lingerie.
11:30 p.m. Somehow, tonight is a bust, too, sex-wise. She had to run errands for her daughter, then a friend randomly showed up. By the time bedtime rolls around, we are both just ready to snuggle up and fall asleep. Funny, when I was married, my sex life used to revolve around the possibility of sex on a semi-annual basis. Now if we don’t do it at least four times a week, I start to feel like I’m letting her down.
7:45 a.m. Running late. Masturbate while A. takes her daughter to school, then get dressed and wait for her to return, so I can take the car to work.
5 p.m. I’ve fantasized about her all day, thinking maybe I can get it up for the night.
Midnight By bedtime, we are both tired. That, and I had a few too many T&Ts.
8:15 a.m. She gets her daughter up, then comes back to bed. We snuggle, which leads to her stroking me. I’m really getting into it when her daughter knocks on the door and says she has to get to school, leaving us both frustrated.
8:30 a.m. While she’s gone, I get up, make coffee, and shower. She gets back just as I wake up my son, who spent the night with us.
8:40 a.m. Son gets into the shower. I’m wearing my robe, and I pull A. into the bedroom, sit her on the edge of the bed, and press my penis into her mouth. I shift so I can give her the easiest access possible, and get hard very quickly. This goes on for a minute or two but since I know I have a hard time coming when she sucks me, I shift so she’s on her back on the bed and I’m straddling her. That’s not working, either, so she licks my balls while I jerk off. At this rate, we could be here all day. I want to come, and am glad getting hard is not a problem, but once again I don’t climax. Age sucks sometimes.
TOTALS: one act of sex with orgasm; two acts of sex without orgasm; one act of cunnilingus performed; one acts of fellatio received; one acts of mutual masturbation; one act of solo masturbation; one intense sexual fantasy.