Meghan McCain to Playboy: ‘I’m Strictly Dickly’

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Successfully remaining on everyone's radar for a little while longer, Meghan McCain did an interview with Playboy, in which, even when asked about politics, she responds, "I'm not scared to get down and dirty." Her candidness doesn't seem completely contrived, but it still reads like a blueprint on staying famous; Playboy couldn't have scripted better answers as she flip-flops between suggestive teasing and wondering why everyone wants to talk about her body. There's no arguing that McCain doesn't know what she's doing. 

At her most self-aware (and yet still self-serving), she tells the magazine that if her father had won, "You would have the craziest first daughter ever, who’d be making ridiculous headlines and hurting the administration every step of the way." The legend grows: "The day before Election Day, I almost overdosed on Xanax. I had gained a lot of weight. I went up four sizes, thanks to Starbucks and Snickers. Obamamania was at its height. I ended up going to Sedona with my girlfriends. All we did was play Rock Band for days and days and eat and sleep and hang out in bed watching TV. I was done."

Then it gets really Playboy:

PLAYBOY: Say a little more about the hanging-out-in-bed-with-girlfriends part.

MCCAIN: Watch it, mister. My friends from home came over to support me, and we got in my parents’ big bed. They have this huge California king and we just stayed up eating ice cream. I’m not a lesbian, if that’s what you’re asking. I’d be the first person to tell the world I was gay. I’m not private about anything. I think you should live how you should live. But I’m strictly dickly. I can’t help it. I love sex and I love men.

The Republican "bad girl" shtick is practically color-by-numbers at this point: She's a diva ("Gay guys love me. It’s the big boobs and blonde hair."), she drinks ("There’s nothing wrong with going out and listening to music and having a little Jack and Coke."), and loves Hunter S. Thompson ("I’ve been considering getting his quote 'Buy the ticket, take the ride' tattooed on my body...").

And that's basically her job at this point. McCain puts it best: "It's America, man." God bless.